I believe this was the thesis of Milan Kundera’s The Unbearable Lightness of Being. I feel there is no right answer, it’s a matter of temperament. Anywheres vs Somewheres could also be seen in frame or arguing the rightness of light vs. dark.
Both desires (stay/go) can live happy inside us at the same time. It doesn’t have to be one or the other. The danger is when, as in Brexit, nativists demand it can be only one.
Anywhere is something that is only possible because a whole heap of us choose to be somewhere; it's not like the anywhere's are spear fishing their own food every day, moving their flocks from pasture to pasture or building their own computers on the fly.
An Anywhere forfeits their potential to really get to know a place, seeing it change over time in intimate day to day detail. They lack real connection to place. A Somewhere has meaningful time honored relationships with the local people, seeing them born, change with the seasons of life and ultimately pass. The Somewhere may leave their area from time to time, but the return to home is sweet, satisfying and savored. The perpetual visitor may feel like a citizen who belongs in the world, but simultaneously is rooted nowhere, feeling connected to everyone and no one, forever an outsider.
I think of it more as a seasons-of-life thing. Most of my twenties were pretty nomadic (even with little kids), then we settled down for a decade or so in Amsterdam. As we’re looking at being empty-nesters, we’ve bought a little place in Italy, and started making friends there.
I also feel like there’s often conflation between staying put where you’re from and intentionally settling in a chosen place. You can fully commit and contribute to a place where you’re not from, and I feel like that should be encouraged, not maligned.
I also think Somewheres and Anywheres isn’t necessarily something you can apply Kant’s Categorical Imperative to. We don’t have to all make the same choices, and both stayers and goers enrich the world.
I loved this article. I spoke to my situation so much. We have been nomading since 2006, but found ourselves in Scotland when my MIL got sick and we were the ones who had the flexibility to come and live with her. My husband's school friends welcomed us back as though he hadn't been gone 30 years. After she passed, in speaking about restarting our nomading, with me complaining about Scottish weather, one friend said (quite aggressively), "There are more important things than weather you know." It made us set up our lives so we are multiple Somewheres instead of constant Anywheres.
I am an Anywhere who has been Somewhere too long. I know the Anywhere lifestyle is not for everyone but I’ve been stuck in place due to illness for the past two years and I feel like I’m suffocating. Too many people wrongly think that we’re Anywhere’s until we find our Somewhere but it’s not like that for me. Thank you for speaking my language and making me feel a little less like an alien.
I can so identify with this. I spent years traveling and backpacking, and eventually realised that the freedom of travelling was no longer what I wanted -- I still wanted to be abroad, but to have somewhere to put roots down. I've finally found my Somewhere -- and I'm moving there with my family this year! So excited :)
I just subscribed to you, I am just loving this article. It brought so much validation.
My husband and I have four kiddos. We lived abroad in Costa Rica for 7 months and it was wonderful; we’ve been here in Arizona for almost 3 years now since, also wonderful… but we find ourselves constantly wondering where to live, since we both work remotely, or will soon be.
Harder to be satisfied.
I’ve really enjoyed vlogs lately that focus in on being present with the moment, savoring the little things…. This is another lost art for *some* (not all) who choose the nomad lifestyle.
How lovely to have the opportunity to experience both. But you are right - you never get back the years you didn't plant seeds. Still, I'll never regret having seen more of the world and it's people, and what it's taught me about myself.
Really appreciated your take on this, thank you! I think this is why many long term travellers ultimately end up settling somewhere. At one point you miss being able to put down roots. I even felt this during my world travels where I stayed and worked in Auckland, New Zealand for a few months - after months of moving every few days, it was a novelty and a pleasure to be fixed for a while, making friends and becoming colleagues at work, for a greater sense of stability.
My partner and I were very happily settled in one city, Paris, for two decades. We became nomads much later in life and are still enjoying that freedom. Happiness and belonging can be found in both sorts of life and is perhaps most realized when you have experienced both. (Or find some middle way.)
This article helped me work through a lot I've been thinking about lately. As a third-culture kid with nomadic parents, my seeds were planted across the globe from the get-go, but I rejected that lifestyle in my early 20s––not in the form of financial commitment. I wanted to be an actor. So, the opposite. Yet, that meant committing to one place: Vancouver (with the possibility of LA or New York).
Once that didn't work out, I went to university, became an online English teacher, and started travelling the globe. I prioritized freedom in the exact way it's described in this article. The idea of leaving behind a community never even crossed my mind because Vancouver, like many places in North America, doesn't prioritize community. It's hyper-individualistic.
Now that I live in Spain and see the value of community, I'm going through a 30s crisis. I live alone and work online, and most of my relationships are quite shallow here. To experience family, close friendships, and community values I love about Spain, I'd need to move back to Vancouver, but to move back to Vancouver would mean going back to a culture that doesn't prioritize family, friendship, and community. I'm an anywhere becoming a paradoxical somewhere.
Brilliant gems in here. Echoing many others, I'm sure, when I say that part of me needed this. I've made similar choices since I was young but at 35, I'm feeling the isolation of such a life much more keenly.
At times, I swear off 'freedom' altogether. Lasts a few months, usually.
I think you hit the nail with the word, balance. I tend to live from knee-jerk to knee-jerk.
I believe this was the thesis of Milan Kundera’s The Unbearable Lightness of Being. I feel there is no right answer, it’s a matter of temperament. Anywheres vs Somewheres could also be seen in frame or arguing the rightness of light vs. dark.
Probably about time I read that. You're the second person recently who's mentioned it.
Both desires (stay/go) can live happy inside us at the same time. It doesn’t have to be one or the other. The danger is when, as in Brexit, nativists demand it can be only one.
Anywhere is something that is only possible because a whole heap of us choose to be somewhere; it's not like the anywhere's are spear fishing their own food every day, moving their flocks from pasture to pasture or building their own computers on the fly.
An Anywhere forfeits their potential to really get to know a place, seeing it change over time in intimate day to day detail. They lack real connection to place. A Somewhere has meaningful time honored relationships with the local people, seeing them born, change with the seasons of life and ultimately pass. The Somewhere may leave their area from time to time, but the return to home is sweet, satisfying and savored. The perpetual visitor may feel like a citizen who belongs in the world, but simultaneously is rooted nowhere, feeling connected to everyone and no one, forever an outsider.
I think of it more as a seasons-of-life thing. Most of my twenties were pretty nomadic (even with little kids), then we settled down for a decade or so in Amsterdam. As we’re looking at being empty-nesters, we’ve bought a little place in Italy, and started making friends there.
I also feel like there’s often conflation between staying put where you’re from and intentionally settling in a chosen place. You can fully commit and contribute to a place where you’re not from, and I feel like that should be encouraged, not maligned.
I also think Somewheres and Anywheres isn’t necessarily something you can apply Kant’s Categorical Imperative to. We don’t have to all make the same choices, and both stayers and goers enrich the world.
I loved this article. I spoke to my situation so much. We have been nomading since 2006, but found ourselves in Scotland when my MIL got sick and we were the ones who had the flexibility to come and live with her. My husband's school friends welcomed us back as though he hadn't been gone 30 years. After she passed, in speaking about restarting our nomading, with me complaining about Scottish weather, one friend said (quite aggressively), "There are more important things than weather you know." It made us set up our lives so we are multiple Somewheres instead of constant Anywheres.
I think it’s important to have base/home to come back to…
I am an Anywhere who has been Somewhere too long. I know the Anywhere lifestyle is not for everyone but I’ve been stuck in place due to illness for the past two years and I feel like I’m suffocating. Too many people wrongly think that we’re Anywhere’s until we find our Somewhere but it’s not like that for me. Thank you for speaking my language and making me feel a little less like an alien.
I can so identify with this. I spent years traveling and backpacking, and eventually realised that the freedom of travelling was no longer what I wanted -- I still wanted to be abroad, but to have somewhere to put roots down. I've finally found my Somewhere -- and I'm moving there with my family this year! So excited :)
I just subscribed to you, I am just loving this article. It brought so much validation.
My husband and I have four kiddos. We lived abroad in Costa Rica for 7 months and it was wonderful; we’ve been here in Arizona for almost 3 years now since, also wonderful… but we find ourselves constantly wondering where to live, since we both work remotely, or will soon be.
Harder to be satisfied.
I’ve really enjoyed vlogs lately that focus in on being present with the moment, savoring the little things…. This is another lost art for *some* (not all) who choose the nomad lifestyle.
How lovely to have the opportunity to experience both. But you are right - you never get back the years you didn't plant seeds. Still, I'll never regret having seen more of the world and it's people, and what it's taught me about myself.
Really appreciated your take on this, thank you! I think this is why many long term travellers ultimately end up settling somewhere. At one point you miss being able to put down roots. I even felt this during my world travels where I stayed and worked in Auckland, New Zealand for a few months - after months of moving every few days, it was a novelty and a pleasure to be fixed for a while, making friends and becoming colleagues at work, for a greater sense of stability.
My partner and I were very happily settled in one city, Paris, for two decades. We became nomads much later in life and are still enjoying that freedom. Happiness and belonging can be found in both sorts of life and is perhaps most realized when you have experienced both. (Or find some middle way.)
I do think it is possible to be both based and transient.
I’m based in New England but move around a
good amount. I like to mix it up but not abandon my communities.
Good point.
This article helped me work through a lot I've been thinking about lately. As a third-culture kid with nomadic parents, my seeds were planted across the globe from the get-go, but I rejected that lifestyle in my early 20s––not in the form of financial commitment. I wanted to be an actor. So, the opposite. Yet, that meant committing to one place: Vancouver (with the possibility of LA or New York).
Once that didn't work out, I went to university, became an online English teacher, and started travelling the globe. I prioritized freedom in the exact way it's described in this article. The idea of leaving behind a community never even crossed my mind because Vancouver, like many places in North America, doesn't prioritize community. It's hyper-individualistic.
Now that I live in Spain and see the value of community, I'm going through a 30s crisis. I live alone and work online, and most of my relationships are quite shallow here. To experience family, close friendships, and community values I love about Spain, I'd need to move back to Vancouver, but to move back to Vancouver would mean going back to a culture that doesn't prioritize family, friendship, and community. I'm an anywhere becoming a paradoxical somewhere.
Brilliant gems in here. Echoing many others, I'm sure, when I say that part of me needed this. I've made similar choices since I was young but at 35, I'm feeling the isolation of such a life much more keenly.
At times, I swear off 'freedom' altogether. Lasts a few months, usually.
I think you hit the nail with the word, balance. I tend to live from knee-jerk to knee-jerk.
Landed me in some interesting spots, though.
Good luck, Russell 🌊 🪁